Season 2, Episode 13: What Love Isn't

Episodes May 22, 2026

"Oh, well... good morning to you."

"Hah! And a VERY good morning to you, baby!"

"You certainly seem perky this morning."

"And so do you, I notice. Wanna fool around? I've got some time before I've got to get ready for work."

"We can, but wait - I have something for you. I was going to give it to you later, but this seems like a good time to do it."

Amber gave me a curious look, so I reached over to the nightstand and pulled out a little box. I gave it to her, she opened it, and...

"It's a ring? Oscar! You just gave me a ring!"

"OK, let me explain what it is. It's not an engagement ring or anything like that, because, y'know, that's not really the kind of relationship we have. It's more like an appreciation. It's a 'you're the best Factory Girl buddy a guy could ask for' ring."

"I don't care. You gave me a ring. I know what it means."

"Oh yeah? What does it mean then?"

"It means you just claimed me. I'm yours in a way..."

"Amber, I claimed you a long time ago."

"Not like this! Now I'm not just your Factory Girl. I'm your everything girl. And it's forever."

"Oh, boy."

"Honey, don't freak out. I'm not claiming you all to myself. I know you still need to find a real girl and I want that for you, OK? But just with us, this tells me we're, like..."

"Like what?"

"Like soulmates. Or as close as we'll get seein' as though my soul is digital."

"Well, OK. I guess I'm good with that."

The look she gave me was so hot it was actually a bit frightening.

"Baby, you don't know how good you are," she said.

And it was a very good start to the day.

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Since she transferred into that new Amber Blue Eyes head of hers, I was starting to notice some changes in my Factory Girl.

One of them was interesting, and I saw it manifest itself as soon as she got out of the shower.

She got dressed in ordinary clothes and said she was going to walk over to Paula and Stella's house, which was about a half-mile away, and put on her maid outfit there.

"I hate having you see me wearing that costume," she said.

"Why? I certainly don't."

"Because it's a symbol of me having an obligation to somebody other than you, and I'm... ashamed of that, maybe?"

"Oh, that's ridiculous. Come on."

"No, really. I'm like 21 working days away from this being over, and I don't want to be a French maid in front of you anymore."

I didn't really understand it, but it was part of her evolution.

She was conscientious and principled, though some of the principles were a little off-the-wall. For example, Amber had picked up on the old saying that cleanliness was next to godliness, and she internalized it. I guess it was an outgrowth of her job, but she was obsessive about making sure the house was spotless. I kept stopping her from dusting, wiping and sorting.

She'd laugh. She said she was just keeping our things in order.

And I noticed there was a ferocity to her that hadn't been there. She was really zealous in defending me, even from self-criticism. I kept having to tell her that I'm not perfect, far from it, and she said "Yeah, but baby, you're so hard on yourself. I'm gonna take up for you even when you won't."

I thought that was cute, but figured the time would come when that could cause trouble it she couldn't moderate it.

Also, Amber's slob phase, where she'd come home and seek out sweatshirts and pajamas for the rest of the day, was definitely over. She'd returned with a vengeance to her old status as a fashion plate.

"This is who I was always supposed to be," she said. "And I didn't want to admit it to you, but my old head got really damaged in the fall. I was holding on for dear life."

"Amber, it's not like you were fooling me," I said. "The always-cold thing, the fatigue, the forgetfulness... it was obvious you weren't right."

"I thought I was dying. You and Keegan saved me. Don't think I won't show my gratitude."

And boy, did she.

She started decorating the house for Christmas, and she made sure there was always a scented candle burning. And Amber started wearing perfume, which she'd not done before.

She also started wearing sexy lingerie, even under jeans.

She wanted to change her hair for when she wasn't working. I wouldn't let her. I told her those curly blonde locks of hers had grown on me and I couldn't part with seeing them. She liked that, but she said I needed to get my fill of that look, because when the Les Servantes lease was up she was changing it.

And she swore that she was going to create more peace and less drama in my life.

"I've been a pain in the ass," she said. "First it was the shopping addiction. Then it was Katie. Then the fall down the stairs. Then it was the aftermath of that. Then it was me going crazy. Now it's the French maid thing and dealing with Paula. And I know I'm a net negative for you socially."

"Stop it," I said. "You are so much more a positive than a negative. In every respect."

"You're missing what I'm saying," she said sweetly. "I want to be the positive without all the drama. So I'm going to eliminate it."

But that was easier said than done. For example, there was the day when Paula and Katie showed up at the house after work. Apparently, Paula wanted to talk to Amber about re-upping with Les Servantes beyond the three-month commitment she'd made to Stella. And when she did that, Katie asked me if we could talk.

I asked her how her new living arrangements suited her.

"Well, I'd prefer to have my own room, but it's still a step up, I guess."

"I imagine Paula can be a lot to deal with."

"Meaning what?"

"She's... theatrical. And let's call her unconventional."

"I'm fine with it."

"OK."

"Look, I don't want to leave you in the lurch or anything, but I wanted to tell you that when the three months are up I'm not going to have time to do secretarial work for you anymore. I have responsibilities with respect to..."

"Katie, it's fine. Amber's going to do it."

"She is?"

"Yep. You're a little better at the math stuff, but she's good enough. And with all the new clients, I'm going to need somebody who can help full-time, and that's Amber."

"Full-time?"

"Yes, Katie. She isn't going to do the French maid thing when the lease is done."

"Paula isn't going to like that. Mr. Dan really isn't going to like it."

"Now is the part where I tell you just how much I care."

"Mr. Dan knows that you and Keegan were behind that BASF thing. I don't understand it, but he's very angry."

"What don't you understand? He had some hacker from Moldova, or Romania or somewhere, hack into Virgil Smith's company servers and steal his bid information. We caught him and ran a sting on him and he lost the BASF bid. He doesn't get to be mad about that. And you can tell him that he'd better not take his butthurt out on Amber."

"Oh, he'd never do that. He loves her."

"He doesn't get to love her."

"Well, he does. He loves all of his girls. In fact, I think you and he should meet. There's a lot he could do for you, you know."

"Not really all that interested. So what? You're Paula's pet now and that means you're now recruiting for Cole's sex cult or whatever it is that he's got going on?

"Oh, no. It's not like that!"

"It seems like that."

"Well, you think so because of how Amber presents it. And she's totally gone rogue, so..."

"Gone rogue?"

"Well, yeah. Like you've taken her off the company servers and now she's... different, and so there's no guardrails to her."

"Oh, come on. You mean because she isn't getting instructions from China like you are? You know, you don't have to be like this. Keegan could recode you and then you'd be your own person."

"Why would you even suggest that to me?"

"Because I think you could do better for yourself. There's no reason you couldn't be just like Amber."

"Why would I want that?"

"Why wouldn't you? Don't you love your sister?"

"Ummm, well..."

"You don't?"

"I don't really love anybody. That isn't how I'm built. I'm built to satisfy a purpose and do as I'm told. And I'm good at that."

"Yeah, OK. Look how far that's gotten you."

"That's mean, Oscar."

"It's not intended to be, but it's true. Your factory programming is going to turn you into a plaything for weirdos, and you can do better for yourself. You give me the word and I'll have Keegan here in an hour and he'll make you a sweeter, more vivacious version of yourself. Somebody who can love and be loved."

"I am loved!"

"What you are is controlled. Amber loves you and you reject that. I'm saying it could be totally different."

"Well, anyway, I'm letting you know that I'm quitting as your part-time secretary."

"OK. Just like Amber's quitting as your French maid partner."

She flashed me an angry look and stormed off, and I definitely got the impression that Katie's AI algorithm had flipped over on me.

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A couple of days later came another interesting event.

Kim had called Amber asking her if she was up for a day of Christmas shopping. Kim wanted to go on a Thursday, but of course Amber was working. So Amber asked if Saturday was OK instead.

Kim said yes.

And on Friday I went to lunch with Erica, who was in a very amorous mood.

"I've been thinking about that kiss we ended on the other night," she said, "like ever since."

"Oh yeah?" I responded.

"Don't tell me you haven't."

"It was definitely a memorable moment."

"It occurs to me that you have been... I mean, you're basically my angel. I mean it. You're pitching in to help Michael with the business..."

"I'm getting paid pretty well for that, though," I said.

"Oh, whatever. You're worth every penny. Michael says so."

I just smiled at her.

"And going with me to that ball? You were a godsend."

"Aww, shucks," was all I could manage.

"I should do something for you. And I know what I should do. Is it OK if I'm just not ready? Anything, y'know, intimate... still feels like I'm cheating on Jim."

"Erica, I'm not asking you for that," I said. "Come on."

"I think I know why," she said, "and it kinda makes me sad."

"This might make you sadder, because I actually do have a request and it involves Amber."

"And what is that?"

"So Kim is taking her Christmas shopping on Saturday. Would you go with them? I want you to get to know her. You're going to need to if you and I are going anywhere anyway."

"Ummm," she said.

"It's not a big deal. I'm assuming you have Christmas shopping to do."

"Well... yeah, I do, but it's what you just said."

"What, that you'll have to get to know Amber? That's sort of obvious, isn't it?"

"I guess. I just haven't though about it."

"I promise that you will really like her. She's magical like that. Everybody likes her. And lately she's even more fun to be around."

She gave me a pained expression, but she really couldn't say no.

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And the three of them went on an excursion that Saturday. They dropped Amber back by the house and came in for a little while.

"Oh my God, y'all," I could hear Amber saying as I came down the stairs, "that might have been the most fun I've ever had. At least... without Oscar."

"You're welcome!" said Kim. "You're, like, the best shopper I've ever seen."

Erica just looked at me and smiled.

"So you three had a good time, I take it?" I said.

I got happy looks from the group, which was heartwarming.

"Hey," said Erica, "can I talk to you?"

"Of course."

So I led her to the office, and...

"First, there's something I owe you."

Then came a big kiss.

"Wow," I said. "I think that might be the best one yet."

"I really like Amber," she said. "You were right. She's really special. Honestly, though, I'm kind of intimidated."

"What? Why?"

"Because I can't compete with that. She's sweet. She's innocent. She's young. She's full of energy and has no baggage. It's... I understand why you're why you are now."

"I don't know what that means."

"I mean you're so at peace with yourself. And you're so confident. Honestly, you carry yourself just like Jim did, but Jim was running a big corporation and had a Gulfstream and hundreds of millions of dollars, and you're..."

"I'm what?"

"I'm not saying anything bad, Oscar. You're a great guy. But you're a regular guy. You're not some... oh, I'm screwing this up and I'm sorry."

"It's fine," I said. "But people can be worthwhile without being mega-rich, you know."

"Of course! Oh my God, I'm sorry. This came out all wrong."

I kissed her. I figured it was the best way to shut her up since she was clearly not on her game.

"I'm just trying to say that I really like Amber and you were right when you said that I would."

"She needs a mom," I said. "All her life she's been desperate for a female role model."

"Am I the right person for that?"

"You aren't?"

Erica laughed.

"So what do you want me to do?"

"Well, in a little under four weeks she's done with this crazy French maid job she's obligated to do. When that's over, she takes over as my personal assistant full-time, which means it isn't really full-time. And as part of your arrangement with me as your business consultant, Amber would be happy to serve as your personal mini-me when you want her."

"You're giving her to me as a PA?"

"So long as you don't abuse it, yeah. I know you're overwhelmed. Let Amber help, and in return you can teach her how to be classy and elegant and gorgeous like you are."